Human
societies have always encountered divisions based on religion, caste, race,
gender, colour, economic class, nationality, and language and so on. Whenever I
come across contents of hate-speeches, abuses, violent events, and wars, some
difficult questions resurface and drag me into never ending internal struggle –
stuck with thoughts meeting dead ends. I often wonder – given all divisive
forces that are so prevalent in human societies, why don’t we, the human beings,
fight all the time? If all of us have so much of hatred for one another, why
don’t we just call for all-out war and finish each other off? Why do we
sustain?
If
we go deeper into the question – “why conflict exists”, it is apparent that
there are at least two perspectives on any topic of interest. When we are
unable to find a common element which holds both perspectives together, the
conflict arises. In other words, conflict is born out of incompatibility of
different perspectives. Let’s see a very simplistic example: a wife wants to
watch a romantic movie with her husband, whereas the husband wants to watch
sports on TV. Both options are not feasible, and the conflict has generated.
The question remains how the couple responds to the incompatibility – who holds
on to the personal desire and who accommodates the other person’s choice.
Conflicts
are inevitable. It is just impossible for us to have compatible perspectives
all the time with everyone. Therefore, whether we spend energy fighting with
each other or collaborate for taking the mankind forward depends on how we
respond to the conflicts. The
zone in which we respond with kindness and consideration, I shall call it “conflict-free”
zone. Different people have different areas of conflict-free zones. The figure
(below) shows possible categories of conflict-free zones. As we move in upward
direction from “I” to “Global Being”, the area of conflict-free zone
widens.
People
in “Myself” category are ready to pick up fights with all others who have
incompatible perspective with their own. They are unwilling to identify any
common grounds between themselves and others. They can be highly self-centred
and egoist.
At
level two, lies people concerned only for their family. These people are
willing for resolving all conflicts within their “family” peacefully; but can neither
forget nor forgive anyone outside of it. A conflict with a non-family member
results into never ending battle for this category people.
On
similar lines, “My Caste/ State/ Language/ Gender/ Religion/ Nation” people
proactively lookout for conflict resolution within those respective boundaries.
They invest all their resources not
only for resolving conflicts within zone-people, but for fighting against the “other
sides”.
People
in all the categories so far dichotomize the human population in – “I” & “You,
or “We” & “Them”. The focus is almost always on –“We are not like them; and
they are not like us”. The “others” are always demonized and considered as the
existential threat. The aggressive response to the conflict is often justified
by “victim” mentality. People rationalize their prejudices that lead to
aggressive reaction saying –“We are victims of their deeds. We were better off
in the past; and they tarnished us. Whatever we are suffering is because of
them” – and so on. Once this is
understood, it is not difficult to understand the genesis of hate-speeches,
abuses, violent events, and wars that we see in the world today.
The
biggest challenge for the mankind is then revealed –“Can a human being rise
above these dichotomies of ‘we’ and ‘them’?” So far, a very few have taken up
this challenge in the history of mankind. Though small in number, these people
have had the biggest impact on the human societies. An individual who takes up
this challenge is called “The Global Being”. Instead of getting trapped into
the cycles of revenge and violence, these people work towards conflict
resolutions by identifying compatible long-term interests. They recognize the binding forces and succeed
in transcending all divides. They realize
the higher dimension of life that links them to all fellow human-beings; and feel
for them, share their suffering, pain, joy, and love. As long as these “Global
Beings” exist, the human society will sustain. The peace and harmony will triumph
over war and hatred.
So
next time when you face a conflict outside your “conflict-free zone”, here’s
the challenge – Can you rise beyond that zone?
